


paperwork

by Yevynaea



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Adoption, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Barely tho i just hadnt listened to the finale yet b4 writing this, Competition, Cute, Family, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Multi, Not Finale Compliant, One Shot, Parent-Child Relationship, Post-Canon, Recovery, Trauma, and said kid being adorable and wanting to help his traumatized family, gaming the legal system so everyone can adopt the same kid, implied autistic tacco twins and angus, implied polyamory but not really, ok listen basically..everyone wants to adopt angus, they've all got problems but they love each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-10
Updated: 2017-08-10
Packaged: 2018-12-13 18:55:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11766240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yevynaea/pseuds/Yevynaea
Summary: Lup, Taako, Magnus, and Lucretia all separately arrive in Neverwinter to file adoption paperwork at precisely the same time.It works out eventually.





	paperwork

**Author's Note:**

> Listen..........you can't tell me Magnus would be the only person tryin' to adopt Ango once they beat the Hunger.  
> You also can't tell me that in a whole century of dimension hopping there were zero (0) accidental or convenient marriages. The Starblaster's crew are all married to at least one of each other and u ain't convincing me otherwise.

The four of them show up at the Neverwinter courthouse at the very same time, and spend a long minute all staring at each other, at the identical sets of documents in their hands (or, in Lup’s case, floating beside her being held by a Mage Hand). People give them all a wide berth, Lup especially; there are whispers, people recognizing them, or wondering what the heck they're doing in front of a Neverwinter courthouse, but no one tries to talk to them.

“So… what now?” Magnus asks. “Do we vote on it, or--”

“We'd all vote for ourselves, dummy,” Taako puts a hand on his face. “Lup, what are you even doing, no one is gonna let a lich adopt a child.”

“Would  _ you  _ wanna be the one to try and stop me?” Lup asks, and they get the sense that she's grinning. Taako gives a laugh.

“You've only officially known him for like, a  _ week _ ,” he says. It has, in fact, been  _ months _ now since the end of their battle against the Hunger, but no one mentions this.

“And if anything happened to him I’d kill everyone on the moon, and then myself,” Lup says solemnly, which might have been easier to take seriously if she wasn't already very dead.

Lucretia sighs. Taako opens his mouth to keep arguing with his sister, but Magnus interrupts.

“How many people can adopt a kid at the same time?” he asks.

“Probably not four,” Lucretia says.

“Should we ask?” Lup floats a little closer to the doors of the building.

“ _ Ugh, _ ” Taako groans in annoyance at the others, but he starts to head inside, and they all follow.

 

“Uh.” Dalla, the half-elf worker they’ve been directed to speak with, seems distinctly uncomfortable as xe looks over the four of them: Lup in her lich form, Taako in a crop top with ‘ _ ask me about my gay agenda _ ’ in large neon font on the front, Lucretia with a very Tired and Done expression that she’s perfected over the last decade as Madame Director, and Magnus now sheepishly holding all four sets of adoption papers.

“I’m not with these bozos,” Taako says, but makes no move to get up from his seat between Lucretia and Magnus.

“We just need to know if we can all adopt Angus,” Lucretia says, for the third time, ignoring Taako.

“Uh,” Dalla says again, then clears xir throat and continues in what xe hopes is a placating tone, “... _ listen _ .”

“Oh no,” Magnus murmurs.

“Not that I don't appreciate you guys, y’know, saving the whole world, and everything,” Dalla holds out a hand for the paperwork, and Magnus hands it over. “But four separate individuals cannot adopt the same child. That's, not how laws work.”

“Why not?” Lup asks, and Dalla suppresses a shiver at the otherworldly and overtly threatening tone in the lich woman’s voice.

“It just isn't,” xe replies, meeting Lup’s eyes-- or, trying to, and not actually finding distinct eyes under the red hood. “You can't just--”

“ _ Listen _ ,” Taako interrupts, waving a hand, and Dalla feels very much like xe should listen closely to what this very trustworthy wizard has to say next. “What if we just, bent the rules a little bit? Just this once. For me, your good friend Taako, from TV?”

“I would love to help you out, Taako, of course--” Dalla pauses, blinking rapidly before levelling an irritated look at the wizard. “Mister Tacco, did you just try to Charm me?”

“It was worth a try,” he replies, unrepentant. Magnus looks plenty repentant for him, Dalla notes. Xe sighs, leaning forward to rest xir forearms on xir desk.

“I  _ would  _ actually like to help you all out with this. But I suggest you either figure this out legally, or draw straws or something. Just-- come back when there are less of you. Because I  _ cannot  _ let the four of you separately adopt the same child. I’m sorry.”

“Well, fuck,” Lup mutters from under her hood.

 

✵ ✵ ✵

 

“A...contest, sir?” Angus adjusts his glasses, looking up to meet Taako’s grin.

“Lup’s idea,” Taako replies. “We got into an argument over who's the best with kids, and since you're  _ basically  _ the only kid we know, we thought why not make you the judge?”

“I'm not the  _ only  _ kid you know,” Angus starts to point out, but then a sheet of paper is being handed to him and he accepts it, glancing over the neat, looping scrawl he recognizes as the Dir-- as Lucretia’s. “A score sheet?”

“For you to fill out at the end of the week,” Taako confirms. “We each get’cha for a week, then you fill out one of these and at the end we see who won!”

Before Angus can actually read the score sheet, it's taken from his hands again and disappeared into one of Taako’s many robe pockets.

“Um, okay, sir,” Angus says, smiling up at his teacher. “I'll judge your contest.”

Taako’s grin comes back even wider, showing off his sharp canines.

“Good man, Agnes.”

 

✵ ✵ ✵

 

All in all, the week living with Taako is…  _ nice _ . Angus gets some new magic advice, and helps Taako cook, and gets his nails painted a nice shade of shimmering blue-green. The two of them and Kravitz go to a farmers market together, and Taako even lets Angus talk at him about the latest Caleb Cleveland novel.

The farmer's market is great. They find all kinds of spices and vegetables and fruits, and at Angus’ request and Kravitz’s insistence, they buy soft pretzels dusted in cinnamon sugar. Taako complains that he could make the same treat at home “better and  _ cheaper  _ than this guy,” but the pretzels are delicious, either way.

They spend most of the day going from cart to cart, haggling and bartering under the sun, and it's just breezy and cloudy enough not to be too hot.

When Kravitz has to go back to work, Taako kisses him goodbye, and takes Angus and their new surplus of produce home.

 

Over the week, there's one instance of Taako sleeping -- “I was  _ meditating,  _ elves don't even need sleep!” “You were snoring, sir.” -- through half of a day and leaving Angus to fend for himself a bit, but Angus is perfectly capable of doing just that, so he doesn't really mind.

 

There's also one time when Angus goes to taste the meal they've just finished cooking, and Taako grabs his wrist. It doesn't hurt, but it makes Angus flinch at the suddenness of it, and Taako lets him go instantly.

“Sorry,” Taako says, so  _ so _ quiet, like he can't make his voice go any louder. He isn't really breathing.

“It's okay, sir,” Angus says. He waits and watches as Taako picks up a salt shaker, sprinkling it over the pan and watching the food like he expects something to happen. Nothing does, and Taako lets out a  _ whoosh  _ of air that turns into an only-slightly-forced laugh.

“Sorry, boychik,” he repeats, accompanying it this time with a playful ruffle of Angus’ hair. “Just-- just needed to check.”

 

On Friday, Taako hands Angus the score sheet, and a pen, and leaves him to it, heading into the kitchen to make lunch. Angus reads the whole sheet over before starting.

_ Evaluation Sheet for: _____ _

_ On a scale of 1-5, how  _ **_supportive_ ** _ a guardian was this adult? _

_ On a scale of 1-5, how  _ **_attentive_ ** _ a guardian was this adult? _

It goes on, through multiple important parental qualities: patience, care, available time, resources, etc. At the bottom is a space for the answer total, and a few lines for “additional comments”.

It all seems rather thoroughly thought out for a dumb contest, especially if the argument was just over who’s best with kids, in a general sense. To Angus, it seems more like the argument may have been over who would make the best  _ parent _ . This, compared with the fact that he's supposed to live with them each for a full week, and the fact that he’s the only kid involved, makes Angus think there's more going on.

He fills out the score sheet for Taako, puzzling over this new mystery.

 

✵ ✵ ✵

 

By the time he is delivered to Magnus’ front door that afternoon, Angus has developed a theory, but he isn't certain of it yet. He needs more data.

Taako knocks on the door, waits about two seconds, then knocks on the door again, harder, and doesn't stop until it swings open.

“Ango!” Magnus greets, brushing past Taako to offer Angus a high-five.

“What am I, chopped liver?” Taako gripes, but the corner of his mouth upturns in a smile when Magnus ruffles Angus’ hair and Angus laughs.

His week with Magnus is fun. They watch one of Jess the Beheader’s matches, debate best dog breeds more than once, and Magnus starts to teach Angus the basics of wood-carving.

 

At one point, they're playing ducks with Fisher and Junior, and Junior pulls on Angus’ wrist, accidentally pulling him into the large new tank that Magnus has constructed.

“Angus!” Magnus shouts.

Angus sputters, righting himself in the water, meaning to reply with an “I’m okay, sir!” but before he gets the breath to speak he's already being pulled out of the tank by the back of his shirt.

“Are you okay?” Magnus asks, almost panicked, putting Angus down and looking him over.

“Yes, I’m fine,” Angus says, coughing a little, and shaking his arms to make them a little less drippy.

Magnus seems inordinately relieved, and almost looks like he’s about to hug Angus before going with a hair ruffle instead.

“Good,” he says. “Good.”

Fisher reaches up a tendril, placing Angus’ hat and glasses at his feet. After a quiet moment, Magnus starts to laugh. It still sounds relieved, but also just amused by Angus’ soaking wet clothes, and Fisher’s ‘help'.

Angus laughs a little too, but quickly gets uncomfortable in his ichor-soaked outfit, and Magnus goes to start a fire in the firepit outside, while Angus cleans off and changes into dry clothes. They spend the evening in front of the fire, and make s’mores.

 

At another point, an evening whittling together ends with Magnus panicking again and Angus getting three fingers bandaged up, and his best effort at a duck looking quite unlike a duck. He feels a little better about it, though, when Magnus puts it on proud display on a shelf in the living room.

 

On Friday, Magnus hands him a score sheet, smiling sincerely, and Angus’ suspicions grow that this is not just any contest. He dutifully and honestly completes the evaluation, and puts the sheet in his bag with Taako’s.

 

✵ ✵ ✵

 

Lucretia’s library is  _ amazing,  _ if a little bit lacking in mystery novels. Their week is quiet, and at times a bit boring compared to staying with Taako or Magnus, but Angus likes quiet, sometimes.

They read, and talk about stories, and Lucretia shows off her ambidextrous writing skills for him. They only leave home and the surrounding garden three times all week: once for groceries, once to the former-Bureau’s biweekly “family dinner”, and once to the bookstore after Angus mentions the aforementioned lack of mystery novels.

 

Sometimes Lucretia is… distant. Not in the way that Merle is distant by pretending he doesn't care about Angus at all, or the way Taako is distant by joking around all the time instead of letting himself feel things. No, Lucretia is distant a different way.

A decade of lies has taken its toll, in the form of making lies seem easier, more normal, more automatic, than the newly recovered truth. She has trouble, sometimes, with conversations; Angus will ask a question and wait up to a third of an hour for the answer, while Lucretia second guesses herself and what to say.

 

Once, Angus gets up in the middle of the night, goes to get a glass of water. He finds Lucretia in the library, still reading.

“Ma’am?” he asks, rubbing his eyes. “Aren't you tired?”

She looks up, hesitates a little while before answering.

“I-- couldn't fall asleep,” she admits. “I didn't wake you, did I?”

“No, ma’am,” Angus replies. “I think you should try again, though, it's very late, and sleep is very important-- for humans, at least.”

Lucretia smiles, and closes her book.

“Okay,” she agrees.

They head off to their respective rooms, and the morning finds them both decently rested, out in the garden waiting for Merle to come help them pull weeds as he’d promised. They're over an hour into it when he actually arrives, Mavis and Mookie in tow, and between the five of them the garden gets done quickly, and they break for an early lunch and some lemonade, sitting in the grass and enjoying the late-summer sunshine. Angus spots a butterfly, and points it out, silently, to Lucretia. She smiles, small, but bright and unburdened, almost  _ young  _ in a way that Angus finds unfamiliar. They watch the butterfly flutter away.

 

Friday comes, and Angus fills out another score sheet, tucking it in his bag. He’s completely certain he knows what they're for, now, but he doesn't want to say anything. Not yet.

 

✵ ✵ ✵

 

Lup and Barry are both back in human bodies by the time Angus comes to stay with them, the two pods sitting empty in storage somewhere.

Lucretia drops him off, and is finagled into staying for dinner, after which she leaves and Angus is led to what might be a guest bedroom, but mostly just looks like a fire hazard, full of trinkets, and gems, and threadbare red jackets and robes, and a number of other things Angus is reasonably sure used to be on the  _ Starblaster _ and have now been shoved into this room.

“Are you secretly part dragon, Miss Lup?” Angus asks, as she and Barry try in vain to move the hoard into closets and off the bed and floor. Lup laughs.

“All elf here,” she replies, wiggling her long ears for emphasis. Angus grins, turns to put his backpack down so he can help tidy up, then yelps in surprise when something  _ whaps  _ the side of his face and drapes over his head. He pulls it off; it's a jacket, worn and a little faded, but in much better shape than anything over a century old probably should be. On the front is a patch, with twelve colorful circles and  _ IPRE _ on it.

Angus looks at Lup. She's got her arms folded over her chest.

“Try it,” she grins.

“Lup, are you sure--” Barry murmurs, but Lup waves a hand at him to shush him, and he stops.

Glancing between the two of them, Angus slowly does as told, pulling the jacket on over his shirt and sweater-vest. It’s oversized, but Angus gets the feeling that it’s meant to be.

“You look like an alien!” Lup jokes. “That one probably used to be Merle’s, or it’d be way longer on you.”

“It's surprisingly comfortable,” Angus notes, rubbing the fabric between his fingers. It’s  _ like  _ other clothes he’s felt before, but isn't exactly the same as any of them.  _ Alien,  _ Angus remembers.

“How’re the sleeves?”

“A little long.” Angus puts his arms down, and the sleeves fall a couple inches past his wrists. Lup looks at them, then glances at Barry.

“Too short,” the couple agrees in unison. Another red jacket is tossed to him, this one larger. Angus dutifully trades it out for the first.

This one’s sleeves fall all the way past Angus’ hands, and then even further. He sends Lup a dubious look, but she grins, a wide, pleased, cat-like expression that she and Taako share. She slips on a red robe, its long sleeves obscuring her hands as well.

Then she flaps her hands, rapidfire, and the too-long sleeves  _ fwip fwip fwip fwip fwip,  _ nearly slapping Barry in the face. Angus is surprised, for a moment, but follows Lup’s lead, flapping his hands too. It's  _ fun _ , and it brings a laugh to his lips, the feeling and the sound of it.

“ _ Best _ clothes stim, right?” Lup sounds smug. “Taako thinks spinny skirts are the best, but  _ we _ know the real truth.”

Angus laughs again, and then they're both laughing, and Barry is grinning and leaning out of the way of Lup’s flapping arms.

 

Lup sometimes spends long stretches of time in silence, and sometimes spends stretches trying to fill any and all silence with chatter, with music, with laughter, with  _ anything _ . Angus doesn't understand, at first, until he follows the sound of too-loud music and finds her in the kitchen one morning, holding a mug with a white-knuckled grip, staring at nothing. Her ears twitch when he walks up to her, and she seems to startle, before waving her wand to stop the music.

“Hey, kid,” she says, turning to face him.

“Are you okay?” he asks.

“Oh, yeah,” she gives a lazy grin, waves a hand dismissively, and punctuates her sentence with a “ _ psh _ ” noise. “I’m good.”

“Are you sure, ma’am?” Angus asks. Lup’s ears droop a little, but the smile stays.

“Yeah, yeah, just…” now the smile droops too. “Sometimes I just need to  _ feel _ something, just to know I can, again.”

Angus looks at her hands, still wrapped, constricting, around the mug. She’d’ve strangled it by now if it were alive.

 

Angus fills out the last of four score sheets over breakfast, Friday morning (blueberry pancakes, a group effort under Lup’s instruction), and puts it with the other three inside his bag.

 

✵ ✵ ✵

 

“Ready to go?” Barry asks, Sunday afternoon, and Angus nods.

“Yes, sir,” he says cheerfully. He’s been at Lup and Barry’s house a little longer than the others, because it was agreed that they would take him back to the moonbase and his dorm there for family dinner. The moon has a fluctuating population, now, most Bureau members finding new homes and new jobs, but most being unwilling, to various degrees, to abandon the base.

Angus, up until last month, was one of only a few people to still live there full time. The moon is busiest on family dinner nights; everyone comes back, and some bring friends, now that the base isn't so secret. It’s something Angus looks forward to, especially considering the thorough silence of a mostly-empty moon.

Coming back for dinner this week feels… sad, almost. His dorm still feels comfortable when he stops by it to put his bag down, it still feels as much like a home as it ever has, but… Angus realizes abruptly that it’s never felt as much like a home as it could.

 

He sits down to dinner with Carey, Killian, Avi, and seven Red Robes. He's still got the jacket from Lup, sleeves rolled up so they don't get in the way of eating.

“Nice jacket, Ango,” Carey says, and Magnus nods agreement. Taako seems to notice it for the first time, standing and leaning across the table to sniff at the fabric.

“That’s mine!” he says, eyes narrowing.

“Oh, sorry, sir! Do you want--”

“Keep it,” Taako waves off Angus’ concern. “Looks better on you now, I think.”

Angus beams.

“Hey, pumpkin, you got those score sheets?” Lup asks.

“Yes, ma’am!” Angus says back. He pulls the sheets from his pocket and carefully starts to unfold them, only for Taako to make insistent grabby hands until Angus hands him the papers.

Taako flips through to find his own name, then hands the rest off to Lup, who does the same and passes the other two to Barry. They go past Barry, Davenport, and Merle before Lucretia grabs hers, then passes the last sheet across the table, where it comes all the way back down past Avi, Killian, and Carey, to Magnus.

“Why couldn't I have just grabbed mine first?” Magnus asks, half-feigning annoyance.

The four of them read through their sheets silently, but Angus remembers perfectly what each paper says. Four scores of 34 out of 40 (though the scores on individual items are different and 99.9% accurate, Angus was purposefully careful to make them add up the same), and no additional comments.

“I do have comments for you, actually,” he says, and they all look up at him. “I just didn't know if I’d have enough room on those lines. Can we talk about it after dinner?”

 

✵ ✵ ✵

 

They talk about it after dinner. Angus goes back to his dorm, tailed by four of his friends (Barry stays behind in the cafeteria, wishing to avoid any looming drama).

“So who won?” Magnus asks, trying to see the others’ scores.

“Thirty-four,” says Lucretia. Magnus and the twins look at her, then at their papers, then at Angus.

“You gave us all the same score, kiddo,” Taako points out.

“I know, sir,” Angus assures him.

“What does that mean?” Lup asks.

“I got fives on like, four things, so…” Taako trails off.

“We all got the same score, Taako,” Magnus rolls his eyes. “You aren't a better parent according to this--”

“Fuck you,” Taako says, without any real heat, but then they're bickering.

“Frankly I’m worried he'll be blown up, with any of you,” Lucretia says.

“I would never be so careless with a kid, how could you think--” Lup starts, and Angus doesn't hear the rest because the four of them are talking over each other, volume growing, and the actual anger behind their words steadily intensifying.

“None of you have asked  _ me  _ yet!” Angus interjects at the tops of his small-ish almost-thirteen-year-old lungs, trying to sound as angry as they do. They fall silent, all turning toward him. “I-- I know what the contest was actually for. It was to decide who should adopt me, right?”

For a single, heartstopping second, Angus thinks maybe he was wrong, that they'll laugh, or look guilty, or roll their eyes, that it was just a silly contest after all.

“Yes,” Lucretia confirms.

“But none of you ever asked me,” Angus says. The four of them look sheepish now, to varying degrees. “I get a say, too.”

“Right.” Lup flaps her hands at her sides. She looks  _ worried. _

“So, who do you say, Agnes?” Taako asks, trying to appear uninterested by examining his nail polish, until Lup elbows him in the side and he puts his hand down.

Angus hesitates, and Magnus misinterprets it.

“It’s okay, Ango. None of us will be upset,” he says.

“Speak for yourself,” Taako mutters, earning another elbow.

“None of us will be upset  _ with you _ ,” Lucretia amends, and Magnus nods.

“I-- well, sirs, ma’ams, I love you all very much, and I know you all love me, and each other, and our friends very much, even if you don't say it. I think you all need each other, and-- I think you've all been through a lot, and you need people to help you, and support you, and I-- I can't do that, the way you need, but I  _ do _ want to help.” Angus takes a deep breath, having expended all the air in his lungs.

“Oh, pumpkin,” Lup crouches down to hug Angus close. “It's grown-ups’ jobs to look after kids, not the other way around. It  _ never _ has to be on your shoulders to help us with our messes, okay?”

Angus looks at all their faces, finding the same concerned-ashamed-proud expressions on all of them, though Taako is doing his very best to hide it.

“I’d like it if you could all adopt me,” Angus blurts. “I choose all of you.”

“That was Plan A, mijito,” Taako says, “but according to some people that's ‘ _ just not how laws work _ ’.  _ Psh. _ ”

“Oh, right,” Angus pushes his glasses up on his nose. There's a long minute of silence, during which they all puzzle over next steps, before Angus snaps his fingers in revelation. “I think I got it! I'll need to read over some law books. Did any documents on the Starblaster survive?”

 

✵ ✵ ✵

 

Dalla is in xir office, filling out paperwork, when there's a small, polite knock on the door. Xe glances at the clock in the corner. There are no upcoming appointments or meetings that xe can remember-- not for a little while, at least. Maybe xir next appointment is early?

“Come in!” Dalla calls, and immediately regrets it, because the door opens to let in a  _ whole lot _ of people.

“Hello, Sir’ram. Angus McDonald.” the kid in front introduces himself, as six adults follow him into the small office. Dalla recognizes all but one of them, a tall man with dreadlocks and a dark suit.

“I thought I said to come back when there were  _ less  _ of you.” Dalla sighs.

“You did,” Lup agrees.

“And yet,” Dalla says flatly, looking over the group.

“ _ Listen, _ ” Taako says, waving a hand, and Dalla feels very much like xe should listen closely-- xe shakes xir head.

“ _ Sir _ ,” xe says in annoyance, and Taako shrugs, once again completely unrepentant. Dalla puts xir head on xir desk. “Am I being intimidated into letting you all adopt this kid? Is that what this is?”

“No, sir’ram,” Angus says. “We came prepared, legally speaking.”

He pulls a number of documents from the satchel slung over his shoulder, and hands the stack over to Dalla. The stamps, the titles, and some of the languages are unfamiliar, but most of them are clearly the same type of document, and most of them are very old and very singed.

“What  _ happened  _ to these?” Dalla asks.

“His fault,” Magnus points to Barry.

“Science experiment gone wrong in cycle… fifty-eight?” Lucretia seems unsure.

“Fifty-nine,” Lup and Barry correct simultaneously.

“Right. The fire destroyed a lot of our official documents,” Lucretia concludes.

“I… see,” Dalla says, looking over the papers again. Xe thinks xe can tell what they are, and the sight of them, of the names on them, stirs memories that aren't Dalla’s own. “Oh,  _ no _ . Are these-- are these marriage certificates?”

“We never thought we’d need ‘em again!” agrees Magnus, grinning.

“Oh my gods _ , _ ” Dalla puts the papers down on xir desk and rests xir folded hands on top of them. “From an I-would-like-to-stay-employed perspective, I feel the need to tell you that gaming the system is, somewhat of a  _ risk _ . Y’know, legally.”

“We're all about risky games, my dude, or did you not get the memo?” Taako grins, slinging an arm over the suited man’s shoulder.

“No I, definitely got it, just like  _ everyone else _ in  _ every plane _ ,” Dalla deadpans. Then xe points at the suited man. “Sorry, the rest I know, but who are you?”

“Kravitz,” he introduces himself.

“Grim reaper,” Barry adds helpfully.

“ _ Oh my gods _ ,” Dalla puts xir face in xir hands. There is a period of strained silence, during which Dalla thinks of the Starblaster, crashed outside of Neverwinter, half shredded and half  _ fucking gone _ , and wonders how in all the worlds these papers, of all things, survived.

“I did some reading,” Angus McDonald starts. Dalla sighs. “Up to three primary legal guardians can file as one unit to adopt a child-- with the child’s consent if age twelve or older, or their species’ maturity equivalent, which I am-- if two or all of said primary guardians are married in some combination. Any other spouses not listed as primary guardian automatically gain  _ secondary  _ guardian rights. Locally, polygamy has a limit of four spouses per person, so we’re  _ more _ than covered. And there's nothing in the laws I’ve read about marriages from other dimensions being unacceptable, so these should all still be binding. All that being said,” Angus takes a very long breath, having used every bit of air in his lungs, “The adoption papers have all been signed accordingly, we just need to validate and file them here.”

Dalla looks at Angus, feeling tired and somewhere between proud and irritated that this child has such a good grasp on adoption laws. Then xe looks at the gaggle of excited adults at Angus’ back. Then xe looks at the marriage certificates.

“My name isn't on any of those--” Kravitz starts.

“Yet,” Taako interrupts.

“--Yet,” Kravitz agrees. “I’m mostly here for moral support.”

“Small mercies,” Dalla mutters, returning xir focus to the certificates.

_ Burnsides, Magnus & Tacco, Taako  _ (“They wouldn't take us seriously because none of us were married,” Taako justifies. “I volunteered to stay on the ship but I drew short straw.”

“You did not,” Magnus gripes.)

_ Dvořák, Lucretia & Burnsides, Magnus _

_ Tacco, Lup & Bluejeans, Barry _

_ Tacco, Lup & Dvořák, Lucretia _

_Bluejeans, Barry & Tacco, Taako. _(Dalla sends them a dubious look at this one, rolling xir eyes at Taako’s indignant cry of “it was an accident! What kind of world makes sharing jewelry and alcohol a binding arrangement?”)

_ Highchurch, Merle & Davenport, --  _ (“Oh, sorry, that one shouldn't be in there,” Angus says, grabbing it back before Dalla can even read it fully.)

When Dalla looks up, sighing, Angus slides a single set of adoption forms across the desk. On the line for child’s permission, there's a carefully handwritten  _ Angus McDonald.  _ In the primary guardian spaces are three signatures:  _ Magnus Burnsides, Lup Tacco,  _ and  _ Barry Bluejeans. _ In the list of secondary guardians:  _ Lucretia Miller-Dvořák  _ and  _ Taako Tacco,  _ as well as quite a few blank spaces left for future additions. Dalla glances at Kravitz, and sighs again.

“As these do,  _ technically,  _ appear to be valid, and you have properly filled out the proper adoption forms,” Dalla pauses, unable to help smiling at the gleeful anticipation on the group’s faces, and xe signs the adoption forms. “Congratulations, Angus.”

“Yes!” Magnus shouts, scooping Angus into the air while the twins  _ whoop  _ deafeningly. There's cheering and hugging all around, and Magnus even tries to lean across Dalla’s desk to give xem an awkward hug.

“Nope, no thanks,” Dalla leans back, and Magnus shrugs and leaves xem be.

“Thank you,” Kravitz says, because it doesn't seem like anyone else is planning to. Dalla nods, and smiles, accepting the handshake the man offers-- and then abruptly remembering he’s death incarnate when his hand is cold and clammy. Dalla tries not to shudder. Kravitz lets go, and Dalla sighs again, this time in relief.

“We're parents! How crazy is that?” Lup laughs, arms around Lucretia and Barry’s shoulders.

“Here.” Dalla magically duplicates the adoption forms, and all the marriage certificates, and puts the duplicates into xir desk, sliding the originals back to the new ( _ old _ ) family. “Now please get out of my office, I have a meeting in ten minutes.”


End file.
